Author Topic: My story - NEVER had an orgasm  (Read 2632 times)

xduskyx99

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My story - NEVER had an orgasm
« on: July 15, 2013, 07:11:38 PM »
.Hello, I'm a 22 year old male and have never experienced an orgasm or any semblance of sexual pleasure in my life. My case seems to be different from others for who this condition developed over time, but since the first time masturbating at the age of 13 I felt zero pleasure during the process and nothing at all when I ejaculated. There was never a feeling of buildup that people describe. It feels no different than rubbing my arm. I visited a urologist for the first time last month and he had no answers. I've tried many different treatments with no success, this includes countless supplements such as zinc, L-arginine, horny goat weed, L-dopa, L-histidine, L-tyrosine, GABA, yohimbe and more. I've also used an electronic sexual device to see if it would stimulate my nerves but got no results.

I had a lab done recently and the results showed my testosterone levels to be above average which only adds to the mystery. I have a masculine appearance. I'm very healthy with quite a bit of muscle mass so you would never expect me to have this condition by looking at me. I'm able to become aroused and get an erection but I can't maintain it during sex because there's no physical sensation or pleasure to keep it up. I therefore rely on viagra to please my girlfriend. When I ejaculate there is no feeling of release or satisfaction. I feel like I would do anything in order to feel sexual pleasure. I've contemplated suicide numerous times because of how much this condition detracts from my quality of life.

I do have a very mild case of hypospadias which occurs in approximately 1 in every 500 males. This means I have two holes at the end of my penis right on top of the other. This is supposedly caused by a slight deficiency of testosterone in the womb, but it's never been known to effect someone's sexual sensation or ability. My urologist did believe there might be a connection between this and my sexual anhedonia, even though hypospadias is quite common and has never been known to have sexual side effects.

I emailed the American Urological Association describing my condition as well as my willingness to become a research subject. I'm still waiting for a response. I'm becoming desperate and want to contribute somehow towards finding a cure.
« Last Edit: July 15, 2013, 07:20:42 PM by xduskyx99 »

xduskyx99

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Re: My story - NEVER had an orgasm
« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2013, 07:14:03 PM »
My last resort is to attempt abstinence from all masturbation or sex for a few months. I'm hoping that my brain will somehow rewire itself, even though this may sound like a long shot it's seemingly the only option I have left.

RobbinMarcos

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Re: My story - NEVER had an orgasm
« Reply #2 on: August 09, 2013, 04:02:41 AM »
What were your female hormones like? estrogen/prolactin/progesterone?

Yanni

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Re: My story - NEVER had an orgasm
« Reply #3 on: August 26, 2013, 02:46:07 AM »
That's a really tough experience for a young lad to have.

I'm not sure that I have ever had an orgasm in my 53 years, although I do feel a little something when I ejaculate but it is hardly worth mentioning:  certainly nothing like the reactions that I have seen other men experience.  It has been very difficult not to get depressed or be consumed by envy in comparing my own experience with others, because it feels as though I am missing out on a very important part of life.  I can understand how frustrating it is.

The major problem, I believe, is that we have no yardstick to objectively compare experiences or derive a benchmark for what most men should experience by virtue of the same biology.  I think there is also an assumption that "men just naturally have full ejaculations/orgasms"  when in reality there may be at least a spectrum.  It has taken long enough to accept that some men have erectile dysfunction issues and to treat it.

Do you feel anything at all during arousal?  I get a sort of tingling excitement when I am interested in sex and sometimes this can be coaxed into pleasurable feelings when my genitals are caressed in certain ways;  yet I am never sure which particular pattern of touch will turn on the pleasure.  At other times, the pleasure switch is turned off and stimulation is uncomfortable and borderline painful.  Ejaculation tends to be a continuation of this pleasurable feeling with a buildup and then a release but only a few minor muscle contractions:  there is no mind-blowing orgasm that involves major contractions of muscles all over the body.  It's like building up to a sneeze, which then suddenly fades out without resulting in a sneeze (and I'm being generous about the sensations).

Have you tried exploring your body during masturbation to see what feels good?  It isn't always the usual vanilla stimulation of the penis that does it, but we can be very reticent to expand our stimulation repertoire because it isn't considered "normal" or masculine or the done thing.

I have a theory that for some people, their brains have to be trained to associate stimulation and pleasure and that it doesn't necessarily come naturally.  Or perhaps an unpleasant experience has forged pathways in an incorrect direction.  In terms of biology, pain is far more important than pleasure to our survival and is therefore listened to more intently. Do you have constant low-level pain that perhaps you are no longer consciously aware of?

jamesmadick

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Re: My story - NEVER had an orgasm
« Reply #4 on: October 17, 2018, 09:43:49 AM »
I believe your hypospadias is the reason for the lack of orgasm. Depending on how serious it was your entire urethra would have had to be reconstructed. Nerve damage and scarred tissues would most likely have occurred. Hence the lack of orgasm. I have hypospadias as well and it has affected the pleasure associated with my orgasm. But i think mine is better as a feel sexual arousal, i have strong erections and feel decent sensation when i have sex. When i ejaculate i feel the buildup and a little sensation but nothing really strong most of the times. S